Wednesday, September 12, 2012

The Posts I Never Wrote- Part 1

Yesterday as I looked through my Post Drafts I saw a lot of terminated creative endeavors.

I will honor them by wondering what the hell I thought I would write about:

***

Title: Match.com
Intended Contents: No idea. Probably that "my friend is doing match.com and is making it sound fun but how could it be".

**

Title: Kitchen Trauma
Intended Contents: This was going to be about the cockroaches that began invading my kitchen in my crumbly studio. And wearing shoes to bed, etc.

**

Title: Mania
Intended Contents: Different kinds of mania- my top examples were going to be Cab Mania: holding the money in my hand the whole time, watching the meter the whole time and jumping out of the cab so quickly so they don't get mad at me for wasting their time. Cash Register/Wallet Mania: Why don't they give you the necessary time to put your money back in a civilized fashion? I stuff my money in there and scram like the store is burning. Why? And Ice Cream Mania: eating ice cream really fast because its melting.

**

Title: No Sandals or Pedicures
Intended Contents: Probably about how I shouldn't wear sandals because I don't get pedicures.

**

Title: Free My Legs
Intended Contents: A case against making beds - because having tight, tucked in sheets is very constraining for peoples' (my) feet. And one has to mess it all up and free their (my) legs anyway for quality sleep.

**

Title: I don't know anyone's name
Intended Contents: True.

**

Title: How to Clear the Street
Intended Contents: Talk Outloud to Yourself

**

Title: Why Can't Everything Be in the Same Place?
Intended Contents: I was talking about social media. Not interesting.

**

Title: Posture: Gargoyle.
Intended Contents: I sit like a gargoyle at the computer.

**

Title: French Women Don't Eat in Bed
Intended Contents: I thought I wrote a post about this? Oh I did. I had a draft too.

**

Title: Real Housewives of Beverly Hills
Intended Contents: No clue. Maybe talk about how much I love Lisa and how much I hate all the other women.

**

Title: Ponytail Chic Bar Times
Intended Contents: I wrote this at 2 am. after a bar and published it, but then the next day I got an email from my only reader: Mom, who told me it was potentially offensive. Rather than edit it- I reverted it to draft and haven't thought about it til now.

**

Title: Practical Purchases
Intended Contents: Eh? I have buyers remorse but end up buying weird things? Probably.

**

Title: Meditation and Hunting
Intended Contents: I want to be a compassionate zen meditator and a ruthless animal slayer.

**

To be continued.

There are too many to put it all in one post.

No comments:

Post a Comment

say whatever you want