Sunday, September 27, 2009

Harlem High

So, last night I spent 55 dollars round trip to go to 147ths street for my friend Matt's housewarming party- and it will be the last time. THE LAST TIME. 

Their apartment is great and cheap- but SO FARRR. And he cruelly freaked me out by mentioning getting mugged or raped by the gangs that hang out on his stoop.

Also there were construction guys working on the lobby when I was leaving at 2 am. What?

It is slightly possible that I hallucinated them, because I smoked pot last night for the first time in 2 years. And last time ever. I was proud of myself for giving it all those chances 2 years ago because, you know, people really seem to love it. But I DO NOT.

It makes me feel weighed down and stuck in a burning body. Its so weird.

Last night I proclaimed- "Oh no. Oh no no I am high. I am high. I knew I hated this. I am high and my SHOULDERS ARE BUZZING". And I could watch everybody laughing but it wasn't funny. It was stupid. 

When high- I (at least) can see the stupidity of what is going on- but can't do anything about it. I keep thinking. "Ugh I am laughing but nothing is funny. They are all so stupid". And then constantly think- why why why why why did I do this? 

And also- in my bed I ate probably 10 brownies- 5 cookies- A half a jar of peanut butter and god knows what else.

Coincidentally, yesterday I saw Extract, the movie, and Jason Bateman's character insists that smoking gets him paranoid... but nobody believes him! And then he smokes- and - guess what- Its not fun.

But no, really, there WERE construction guys in the lobby working at 2 am.