Sunday, December 26, 2010

Christmas Lessons

Christmas went smoothly- which is kind of boring. But it DID snow yesterday! Which is miraculous. And it is snowing now.

Dad "We really are getting that blizzard"
Me "Should I go stock up on stuff?"
Dad "What stuff? I just got Tuna and Peanut Butter From Trader Joes"
Me "perfect"


It really was filled with family, food and ... general good tidings.

(I do not understand why my photos upload from my phone not fully loaded. IT IS VERY ANNOYING. So Until I figure out that issue, I must deal with a grey bar under all my pictures. I guess I could crop it out....)

I have 2 Family Christmas Parties:

  • The Dooners (Dad side) on Christmas Eve
  • The McHughs (mom side) on Christmas Night

I will code each occurrence with the name Dooner or McHugh

Both gatherings are pretty nice, both are filled with LOTS of my cousins that are ALL younger than me. Both have a Polyanna for the Kids, White Elephant for the adults (where you steal gifts), Dinner, Lots of Dessert, lots of wine, and I often end up having to sing some scratchy version of a song. (Voice scratchy, I mean)

There are a few things to note:

Lesson #1:
Older "Kids" try to get in the Adult White Elephant/Chinese Polyanna get screwed.

Dooner: My 20 year old cousin brought some nice gift to the White Elephant Polyanna. He was screwed with my mother's gift of

a decorated pitchfork. My dad took pity and stole it from him. So now we have two because my mom obviously bought herself a decorated pitchfork, too.

McHugh: I, too, tried to get in on the Adult Christmas Cheer. I actually didn't give my aunt her present so I could put it into the Christmas White Elephant.

In the end I got:

something to this effect- because I didn't take a picture. An italian cookie tray (and a battery operated spaghetti-twirling-spoon). Not bad, but I opened it up for people to eat with dessert and still not as good as my pretty Anthropologie coasters that I brought (that my bald, unmarried Uncle ended up with). Poop.

Lesson #2: Outsiders must be Brave
Dooner: This woman above is my divorced Aunt's Jewish friend that she met in AA. She was perfectly nice and fine and was even able to (slightly) make fun of her own shoes... but she was a character. And so are we all, but she was her own kind of character. She spent a lot of time on her iPhone, which is a nice crutch- I guess. 

She was brave because talk can be mean. EEEEEeeeeppppp.

Lesson #3:
Don't repaint your Artist Sister's Painting as a Joke.

McHugh: My mom is an artist (of sorts), my uncle is a comedian (of sorts) and he repainted her first real painting from years ago with white to make it "brighter". He did not foresee her anger.

There is no painting in this picture but these were their general sentiments.

Some other tidbits: 
Dooner: My Uncle chose the Onion Chopping glasses. His wife Laughing in the corner.

Dooner: My Dad excited about gift that was stolen soon after
McHugh: Aunt who decorated this winter wonderland. Grandmom, Dad
McHugh: Italian Uncle (hence my cookies) and bald Uncle who has my coasters
Dooner: This shows sheer volume of people. There are so many more people I didn't show

And last, but not least-

McHugh:  This is my 4.5 year old cousin singing Miley's Hoedown Throwdown

I leave you with this. Merry Christmas.

(Note: ANY picture you see that does not have a grey bar at the bottom was painstakingly cropped by me or uploaded a second time through twitter or email. I work SO hard.)