Tuesday, May 14, 2013

things that really bum me out.

  • the desert - everything about the desert is horrible. It is too hot, everything is dead, there is no water, there are hard rocks on the ground that probably hurt your butt if you try to sit down, occasional sandstorms, cruel mirages, and thieves. There are lizards, there are snakes, and there are cactuses everywhere. Don't try to tell me cactuses aren't awful because they are... just... obviously horrible.
  • having no time for dinner - now your life is busy and important and depressing
  • texas - or "the idea of ", because there are no seasons, and there is a desert all around and to the west, and lots of people are obsessed with hats and hair, but they hate my gay friends

  • the concept of going into outer space - space is kind of like the desert, but even worse, because there is literally nothing. I can't even fathom how hard it would be to enjoy food, or company, or sleep, or happiness, if I was shot into nothingness in what looks like a very uncomfortable outfit, in a big metal compartment. Where are they even going? And WHY? And do they have wine in space? I bet they don't. Can people hear in space? I am thinking no. There are no seasons, no greenery, no gravity, and who KNOWS what temperature it is, and there are a million ways to die in space. It really, really bums me out.
  • malls - as if I didn't hate shopping enough. Now I am lost inside a huge maze of dressing rooms and the only food for miles is Chick-Fil-A and Taco Bell. No.